Chasing Sorrow

Somewhere deep inside me,
behind many gates,
behind many padlocks,
is a nameless sorrow
patiently waiting to be released.

Music, the master of all sorrows,
sometimes pounds on the gates
and attempts to give it a name,
quietly calling it out
from its dark dungeons.

Thinking back of my childhood
and the last few years of my life
sometimes tries to give it a name,
causing it to shed a few teardrops
in a lonely silence.

I know it is there
in the deep shadows of my heart,
waiting for me to uncover its name,
to call it in humble whisper
making it raise its head,
releasing it in all its turmoil,
liberating the might of downfall.
I am calling on my sorrow,
waiting for facing my death once again
since something in me needs to die.

My dear sorrow, please wake up,
please fall on me like a giant wave
taking me far from the shore
in a current so strong it is useless to swim.
Take me to places unknown,
to depths I can not breathe,
to darkness I can only feel but not see.
Let me surface knowing I faced my death,
knowing I stumbled through the narrow gate
that leads to life.

Please wake up and let me cry,
please transform yourself into teardrops,
into deep sobs and shaking.
Let me say goodbye to you.
I know the farewell will be full of pain
but I will be pleased when you have left.

please wake up
and make my life a hell
that opens the gates of heaven.

"And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes,
and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying,
neither shall there be any more pain;
for the former things are all passed away."

Revelation 21:4

Image copyright Blu Gnome Graphics
Facing Self